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Thursday, November 11, 2010

The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.

Everyone has heard the biblical quote, "Love thy neighbor as thyself." If we were all to love each other as much as we loved ourselves, the world would be even worse than it is now. Now a days it seems no body realizes how great they really are. Yes there are those few balloon heads who have enough ego to feed a third world country, but the majority of people I know have such low self confidence. Contrary to the general belief, people usually blame themselves more than they should. If something goes wrong, it's somehow always are fault. We weren't pretty enough. We weren't skinny enough. We weren't cool enough. We weren't athletic enough. We weren't rich enough. We weren't good enough. That last one kills me.

I know personally, I never feel good enough for anything or anyone. I cannot tell you how many times people have told me that I am a "jack of all trades, but a genius at none." I also cannot tell you how painful that is to hear. It really sucks when people tell you that you are capable of everything, but not actually good at any of it. I always feel like I'm good in school, but not good enough. I'm a good dancer, but not good enough. I'm a good singer, but not good enough. So I've basically trained myself to think that I'm not good enough at anything. Or when something goes wrong in a friendship or a relationship, I always think I did something wrong, that I wasn't good enough for them. I never even contemplated the fact that maybe they changed.

There are so many people that I see on a daily basis walking around looking down, shoulders hunched over, insecurity out for the world to see. We all need to start appreciating how amazing we really are. We are all beautiful in someone's eyes. We are all intelligent in someone's eyes... some more than others... but God gave some people more beauty than brains, and that's perfectly okay. We are all loved by someone. We have to start seeing how extraordinary we are. And sometimes, we are going to need help. I just began talking to a friend of mine that I had a falling out with. We were such great friends and he was such an amazing person, but things happened and unfortunately it took a toll on our friendship. We were talking for the first time in months and he was telling me about how nothing seemed to be going write. And he was taking the blame for it. So I wrote him a letter telling him how amazing he was, pointing out the qualities in him that I saw that made him who he was- the things he should be proud of. Take the time to write a letter, or write on someone's wall, or email them and tell them how great they are and why. I promise you will feel better about yourself, you will see how blessed you are to have such a great person in your life. But what's even better is how amazing you are going to make them feel. 

I also don't think we realize how much we affect someone's day. About 3 weeks ago, I was having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day- as you know if you read my blog post. Looking back, I realize that my bad mood put the other people around me in a bad mood, and their bad mood just added to my bad mood. Not only did I ruin my day, but I ruined theirs too. Also looking back, my day could have been SO much worse than it was. I'm Italian, I exaggerate. My day really was not that bad,  mean it was super unfortunate, but it in all honesty could have been a lot worse. I've been trying to rid my life of the things that bring in negative energy so that way I can be more positive and in turn so will the people around me. The easiest way to brighten someone's day is a smile, or even a compliment. Just telling someone that they look good or telling someone they are pretty or amazing will definitely turn their day around.

We have to learn to accept that someone else's choices are not our fault. If someone stops liking us for who we are, that's not our faults. That's theirs. We also have to learn to accept that people come into our lives and people leave our lives. There is a reason. We don't know why, but there's a reason. Just accept it and move on. Oh and smile please. I know it's hard sometimes, but it's the most effective way to change someone's day. And how can you not smile when someone's smiling back at you? I dare you to try. 

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